Power, part 1

Power....

Take a minute to feel, not just read, as I ask the following questions...

How do you feel when you have power?  How does it feel to you, to not?  How does it feel when you believe power has been taken from you?  What happens in your mind, body, spirit?  In what ways do you allow the depletion of your power?  Stay with this feeling for a moment, talk about it with someone or, write about it before you move ahead... 

Now what about when you attempt to take some one's power or diminish it?  You might say, "I don't do that!"  But when is the last time you gossiped, critiqued, judged, or engaged in a clique?  When and how have you not been inclusive?  What about the times that you felt assuredly justified, like toward others who have inflicted harm or broken the law?  How do you justify their exclusion and the understandable diminishing of their power?  Now, how does this feel to your mind, body and spirit?  Take some time with this feeling for a moment, talk about it with someone, write about it before you move ahead... 

How many times have you contorted yourself into places you don't fit just to try and get a piece of control (job interviews come to mind...)?  And when have you persecuted others that don't fit into your image of what is supposed to be, to get a little superiority over someone else (politics come to mind...)?  We fight, we manipulate, and we war.  Someone who has more power has control, less power, less control... around and around and around we go where we stop, nobody knows.  With change so necessary to the cessation of our and our planets destruction, the subject of the power of control cannot go unaddressed. 

   

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”

― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

Once upon a time I thought I was doing a good job when I approached the supervisor's closed door, the meeting was set to discuss a subject I long had requested to be addressed, so I was in happy anticipation.  There she sat behind her over sized cherry desk with a short legged chair vacant in front of it.  My presence was requested but the actual subject matter was concealed.  I consequently was caught off guard and felt ambushed because the topic sure was not what i was prepared for.  Prior to this day there was not a word of displeasure or conflict spoken, no dialogue or discussion on problem solving, on this particular day however, the subject vacillated between, "not fulfilling your contract," to "your style is not mine," to "don't have to have a reason as you are under contract and we have made a decision," to "we are terminating your contract." 

I felt my power draining away under their immediate control over my life and ability to provide for my family.  My blood pressure amped by the flood of adrenalin caused by the primitive threat to my survival.  I kept fairly silent in freeze because it was apparent they were not beyond stripping me of any control I may have, even though the urge to war, or run, pushed up against the edges of my rational thinking.  This happens all the time in business, I have heard about and dealt with the survivors.  The resource of humans are treated as expendable objects that house power to be siphoned off and used elsewhere.  "Just business," right?  This time it was happening to me, so the rational thinking I coach so many to achieve was not so easy.  So sure, I was absolutely enraged, the thoughts that came to my mind put me in the league of the disgruntled, who hadn't stopped themselves from expressing that behind a trigger of a gun, or the force behind a physical blow.  But... I have dedicated my life to change and healing, inclusion and integrity and peace, so now what?  Sure I was angry and what it inspired in me was a want to act on my rage and the feelings of being victimized, disregarded and disrespected. 

Was I really going to make change by returning the same energy back to them in a revenge filled volley?  

Mary can be reached at www.realaspect.com or www.facebook.com/realaspect.  Please join her next week for Power part 2.